crazybabygal's blog: "just my blog hehehehe"

My Way.. Life’s so funny I think I’m loosing my mind I’m laughing so hard I just may cry Shit don’t faze me no more Life’s just one big joke The story of my life Ha! I could write a book. Shit happens And life’s a bitch But as long as I’m here I might as well make the best of it So I’m gonna do what I want to do Fuck what people say It’s my life damn it I’m gonna live it my way!

some say im crazy some say im good some say i need help of others but to me im me an thats what i like about myslef i dont be who im not. i dont play games with hearts im no fool of love . some say im greatful some say im strong im just me an only me another i play two roles in life a mother an father some say im good in many ways some say i have came a long way due to my hell of a past but they always say im me an thats what makes me diffent an loved ...

I'm all smiles Laughter filling the room Everything seems perfect Everything seems great. I call him to tell him I love him He tells me he loves me I hang up with a smile Close my eyes and imagine us together As soon as I open my eyes, I burst into tears I know what comes next I know the pain and can feel my heart aching already A fear overwhelmes me Starts to kill me slowly As I fear losing him I just can't do it I can't lose him again Can't see him with another My heart isn't strong enough anymore So fragile to even the thought I know what comes next I'm mad at myself for becoming happy For smiling and laughing It feels so wrong Cause it scares me so much If I lose him I don't think I can go on I have fallen in love And love doesn't seem that great Like a roller coaster I'm going higher and higher We're at the top Everything is great I know what comes next And I just relized I'm scared of heights.

one of a friend had die yesterday she was only 26 yrs old she was sick an all an her mother went out for 30mins to get her daug sum meds like she asked when the mom came back in 30 mins time she was out not knowing she would cum home to her daug.. dead in bed so this weeken started out sucks ... i feel so bad for the mother to have to fine her daug that way... ive had people worried about me cause mixing pills an so on so now this has wake me up cause lossing a friend even tho she wasnt close it was a friend an it hits hard cause death aint no toy thats for sure cant take it back i feel so bad tho not even sure what to say when they told me i was blank i didnt know if they was playin cause she was just out at the club wed.. for drunk an drown so see death can cum any time but we think she had mixed the wrong pills not knowing well i dont know what to say now so im out ... girl ya be missed know that

-------------- I'm all smiles Laughter filling the room Everything seems perfect Everything seems great. I call him to tell him I love him He tells me he loves me I hang up with a smile Close my eyes and imagine us together As soon as I open my eyes, I burst into tears I know what comes next I know the pain and can feel my heart aching already A fear overwhelmes me Starts to kill me slowly As I fear losing him I just can't do it I can't lose him again Can't see him with another My heart isn't strong enough anymore So fragile to even the thought I know what comes next I'm mad at myself for becoming happy For smiling and laughing It feels so wrong Cause it scares me so much If I lose him I don't think I can go on I have fallen in love And love doesn't seem that great Like a roller coaster I'm going higher and higher We're at the top Everything is great I know what comes next And I just relized I'm scared of heights.

Sometimes I look at you Sometimes I look at you and I do not recognize you. I study your features with my fixed gaze and meditate on your soul. Sometimes I look at you and wonder why God created a person such as you, why God chose those specific facial facets, those particular curves of your body, the soft texture of your hair, the smooth hue of your skin, the length of your arms and the bass of your voice. Sometimes I look at you and can see only you and nothing else around you. My eyes penetrate your skin and see your mind, your heart, your soul and the life of bliss and the idyll world that I so often conjured. Sometimes I look at you and I wonder how God knew that I would truly love every piece of you, and how God could create the life that I once thought was only a dream.

You and Me There is a type of silent wish, That's been hidden in my heart, And these winds cry in a way, And they speak the language of their tongues, This moon is star-lit, and the stars are a bit moon-lit, These winds will turn shameless, And the leaves will turn crimson red instantly, Understand me, my feelings for you are indescribable, My hands are meant to fit the spaces in yours.. And my lips were created to hug yours, My arms were made to embrace you, as were yours, When all this happens, the heavens are on our side, I'll die within your love and you won't be able to live on, Can there be such love? Or is it a blessing bestowed upon us? My wishes can find a shelter in your heart, for all of eternity. For I will follow you where you are, just as the moon and the stars

Happiness seems like a distant memory something i use to know maybe use to remember everything now is just muddled togeather smothered by a blanket of darkness now this i remember i can feel it there deep deep down inside my being it wants to come out but it's this blanket of darkness that just wont lift it's keeping it all down hidden so i cant see everything that is good in this life of me it's suppressing and controling smothering and with holding this feeling i know was meant to be slowely dying slipping away losing its will to ever be as this blanket of darkness keeps its hold keeping its element of control on me i cant make it lift let go of me im slowely dying why cant no one see that this this just isn't me who i was meant to be

Never Picked A Fight With Me you think because your my friend i wont talk back to you you think because your my friend, ill twist and bend to make every one of your desires come true your not a friend you treat me like shit time and time again you need me, because you no ill be there when i need you, you just watch and stare you dont have my back you never did you never will you expect me to be there when your life slips off track this yearning to show you i dont mess around i will fullfill i will make you feel my pain when your bleeding on the floor, my response will simply be "dont complain" you dont want to make me mad, too late for you though once you betray me, youll have no where to hide no where to go ill make sure you hurt ill thrive ill make sure you cry ill laugh cant wait for the day, when you need help from me ill make you beg and beg till your on your knees SPIT IN YOUR FACE FUCKIN DISCRACE turn my back and walk away im not your bitch anymore todays the day your gunna listen to what i have to say sorry it had to end like this i kept my mouth shut for too long you mess with others,think your kool youve never picked a fight with me you ignorant fool im going to mess you up, to where you cant even look at me when you hear my name, you will get chills i'll teach you to betray what now bitch, what does your pussy ass have to say?

A Special Drop of Love A special drop of love was deposited in my womb with care The unconditional love you give to me is so very rare When you were born, Oh! What a glorious day! I never knew there could be a love so strong I am so blessed, because in my heart there is a song A song of peace and assurance A song of strength and endurance When I look into your eyes, my heart feels your love A Special Drop of Love came from heaven above Your smile gives your face that special glow Whenever you look at me, my love for you continues to grow The Hugs! The Kisses! These are moments of pure gold They are treasures I have hidden deep within my soul Many told me you would not make it this far But look at you now, gleaming like a shining star Every sound you make is like music to my ears The look you give me helps wipe away my tears Many have wondered, "Why me?" I looked at you and wondered, "Don't they see what I see?" Many have wondered, "What am I going to do?" But when I look at you, I know I can make it through Yes, I get tired sometimes and the tears begin to flow But then you reach for my hand and that's when I know That healing comes after the pain And the sun comes after the rain God trusted me with such a treasure The joy I feel is beyond measure As each day turns into night I feel the strength to continue to fight As each night turns into day I know that God hears every prayer I pray My hopes and my dreams are far beyond me Your encouragement and joy allows me to be free A Special Drop of Love came from above A precious little package for me to LOVE I know I am strong and can conquer any trial When I look in your face and see your smile